10 Day Challenge. Day Five.

Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.

This is a lonely topic. Well, welcome to memory lane. There are things that are very depressing to remember but, if it weren’t for those experiences, I would’ve never learned, nor grow as a person. So I’ll just post 6 things that was so disappointing that it gave me a hard kick in the ass lesson in life.

1. Answered back my dad - Yes, I did. I even called him a “crazy bitch”. It was a depressing time for me back in the day. And I needed somebody at that time that would be strong for me. But my dad wasn’t. He showed weaknesses. He was supposed to be the stronger one. But no, he be buddy-ing alcohol. And thus at that moment, I’ve declared a no psychological father figure for myself. And that I needed to be strong. I don’t need a manly, fatherly figure to rely on. I am my own.

2. Cut the communication between my HS group of friends - Considering my transferring of schools, it was a really hard decision to continue talking to them. So for almost 2 years, I cut all the electronic communications possible. No wonder I’ve got less friends than the normal. But I’m happy with that decision because through that, it sifted the real from passerby’s of my life. Even if I only got one HS friend left, she’s legit.

3. Rejecting that one guy who has ever truly seen my greatness - I should’ve kept even the friendship. But I know it would be hard for him to move on if I consistently show him appreciation, or false hope. If I was more mature that time, could’ve handled it more logically than too much impulsive emotions. But if it weren’t for the cold shoulders, he would’ve never moved on. Or whatever, idk with him. But one thing is for sure, I need to regain the friendship back.

4. Gave up the one who really loves me for someone who doesn’t even love me back - I AM AN IDIOT, I KNOW. And that taught me to just love who truly loves you, and actually KEEP IT. 

5. I should’ve went to the Team Building instead of the fucking PE classes - Learned that there are things that are worth the risk. 

6. Never having the courage to tell what I REALLY feel for that person - I don’t know of if I’m really regretting it or shit but, IDK, I still live in the possibilities of terrible WHAT IFS.

(Source: bibingkagirl)

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